I was very shy growing up. In fact, I still consider myself a shy person. I get extremely nervous when I met new people and when I have to go somewhere I have never been before. I don’t like not knowing what’s going on and I hate being thrown into situations that force me to deal with the unknown or ‘play things by ear’.
So, with that said, you may be asking yourself, how can I be a photographer – a wedding photographer at that! Weddings by their very definition should not fit comfortably with my shy demeanour. But that is the glory of photography for me – it allows me to truly be myself.
With my camera in hand, I feel like I can conquer the world! I am no longer afraid to talk to new people or to go to new places. Being spontaneous or going with the flow is no longer a horrible thing, in fact it has lead to some of my favourite images! When I am shooting I feel like I am able to be the version of myself that is free of my many insecurities as they fall by the waist-side. In their place I am filled with confidence. Confidence in both my photographic and creative abilities as well as confidence in myself and my social interactions. I am an awkward person by nature, and normally this is enhanced when I am put in a new situation, but when I am shooting I am able to embrace my awkwardness and make it work for me, my clients, and my art.
I have always known that bride + grooms are not models and most of them aren’t comfortable being in front of the camera. But since I starting shooting them, I have learnt how to get them to embrace their own shyness and how to make them really shine in their photos. I am told, my own awkwardness make my clients feel more at ease and, more often than not, the things I am most insecure about, like my clumsiness, often brings a natural smile to their face.
I love sharing images with my clients that they love. I love being able to share my art with the world. But in the last couple of years, I have learnt that the thing I love most about photography is how it makes me feel – happy and truly myself.